Letters From North America
by Peary Perry
Flowers and the oil cartels
| Once the country
gets out of the war mode and things get back to a sense of normalcy;
I’d like for the Congress to impanel one of those congressional investigative
hearings they seem to run at the drop of a hat.
This time I’d like to have our august congressmen and women look into
the conspiracy behind the obvious oil cartels and the blooming plant
industry. I believe it’s been going on for years.
Yes, friends I’m here to tell you that I believe I have uncovered
more than you ever want to know about this obvious plot to undermine
our national economy and my personal sanity. Just sit back and hear
me out for a few moments while I explain.
All of us, no matter who we are or where we live…like flowers, don’t
we? We buy them for our houses, apartments, offices, weekend places….
you name it and we’re buying them to brighten up our lives. We buy
them for places we don’t even own. Look at where you work, how many
of the folks around you have some sort of blooming plant stuck in
their office? Nearly everyone. This is a giant industry.
Now, if you’re like me you go to some nursery or super hardware store
and walk the aisles in search of that new and unusual plant to spice
up either your home or office. These places have thousands upon thousands
of plants. All in perfect condition, all blooming their little hearts
out. You find it difficult to decide which ones to choose, they all
look so beautiful. Some are stuck over in a corner and you think to
yourself…”I like that one, I think I’ll buy it, and take it home where
it’ll have some love and attention.” So, you make your way through
the checkout lines, take your new purchase home and lovingly put it
in a new pot, watering it carefully and adding some plant food. Then
you set back and wait, just knowing in your heart that this new addition
to your life is going to appreciate your efforts and just bud like
crazy and then produce the most spectacular flowers for all to see
and admire. Then you can kind of grin and shuffle your foot and say
something profound like…”Ah, shucks, it wasn’t hard…”
Admit it, that’s what you want to happen…. but does it? No, of course
not. Once you leave the confines of the store the plant or flower
starts on a death spiral. Circling faster and faster towards a stage
of complete and total wilt. In the space of about twenty-four hours
your lovely beautiful plant or flower has managed to die before your
very eyes in spite of all of your best efforts. Therefore what do
you do? You stubbornly trudge back to the store and then what? Well
you buy some more. Thinking all the time that the last ones were somehow
defective and the new ones will do better. They’ll thank you this
Does this ever happen?
Not in your lifetime.
Which leads me to my new theory. After you have repeated this for
the umpteenth time, you finally give up and do what? Yes, friends
this is where you become the unwitting victim of the OPEC cartel.
You swear off of real flowers and plants and you succumb to what?
Yes, plastic ones that will never wilt or die.
Now, hold on …just a short way to go before I finish. What is the
basic product that makes up plastic…you guessed it…oil, of course.
So, the more plastic we want for the flowers that have died, the more
oil we need and so on and so on. Those crafty OPEC members are smart,
they know we’ll eventually give up trying to coax blooms out of flowers
and plants that are probably genetically engineered to start dying
after they leave the store. Big oil is big money. They want us to
give up and buy plastic. I bet they started thinking about these years
ago. This is not something I’ve made up. My friends all tell me they’ve
had the same experience. Most of the stuff they buy in the stores
dies soon after they bring it home.
How much more proof do we need?
I strongly think a congressional committee should look into this as
soon as possible, don’t you? I mean, we’re wasting time. Those roses
I bought just last week have given up the ghost this afternoon. This
is a travesty being played out on all of us. We have rights. Don’t
© Peary Perry
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