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Texas | Columns | "Texas Tales"

Fun Beauty Shop Names

by Mike Cox
Mike Cox

So when did it become federal law that all beauty shops must have funny names?

Recently noticing in the San Antonio area a salon called "Lady Dye" it occurred to me how many humorous shop names I've seen over the years. Hoping to contribute to the canon of Texas folklore, I decided to take an informal survey of beauty shops in Texas to gather data in support of my theory that it's against statute for the proprietor of a hair salon to display a boring sign in front of their place of business.

One thing's for sure, Texas women no longer go to a beauty parlor. These days they get their tonsorial needs met at beauty salons or shops. Parlors are as out as last year's do. As for the fun names, most involve puns but some are just clever combinations of words.

While online research shows that funny shop names are a national phenomenon, Texas is well represented among smile-stimulating women's hair-related business names. I'm sure a business' name is no indicator of the quality of its service, but if I were a Texas female, a good name might just be enough to get me in the door.

Here, listed alphabetically, are the Texas hair business names this non-scientific search "highlighted":

512 exSALONce, Round Rock. (Word gamers welcome.)

The Best Little Hair House in Texas, Beaumont. (Wouldn't LaGrange have been a more appropriate location.)

The Big Bang Hair Salon, Lubbock. (What's the theory here?)

Big Texas Hair, Timpson. (Not a play on words, but reflective of the Texas woman image.)

Blond Ambition, El Paso. (You doubtless have more fun here, too.)

Blond Faith Salon, Austin. (You takes your chances...)

Blood, Sweat and Shears, Bedford. (Of appeal either to history buffs or jazz-rock group fans.)

Cost Cutters, El Paso. (Like a barber college?)

Cowlicks, Amarillo. (Highly appropriate for a city with a large cattle auction operation and assorted feed lots.)

Curl Up & Dye, San Angelo. (Sounds pretty grim, but obviously they don't give a flip.)

Cut'N'Loose, Longview. (Talk about having a wild hair.)

Cut and Shoot. (No, wait, that's a name of a Texas town. But wouldn't that be a great name for a shop catering to outlaw motorcycle gangs?)

Do Or Dye, Houston and Amarillo. (For when you are really having a bad hair day.)

Dye Pretty, Round Rock. (Sounds like a James Bond movie.)

Eclips, Beaumont. (Either for the digitally addicted or astronomy buffs.)

Electric Hair, Nederland. (Shouldn't this place be in Huntsville?)

Fifty Shades of Hair, Corpus Christi. (Let's just say fans of E. L. James will get this name.)

The Last Tangle, Lubbock. (This name would have been better in Paris, TX)

Mane Attraction, El Paso. (Under the big top.)

Mane Trendz, Austin. (For the latest fashion.)

Mane Street Hair, Corpus Christi. (But it's actually on Williams Drive.)

Hair Control, Odessa. (A surprising number of places take flight with "hair-air" puns.)

Hair Deaux, Euless. (It'll do.)

Hair Force One, Bullard. (All First Ladies cordially invited.)

Hairistotle's Hair Place, Cedar Hill. (Get a perm and a little cosmology.)

Hair 'N' Beyond, Corpus Christi. (Would have been a good name for a shop near NASA's headquarters at Clear Lake City.)

The Hair Port. (Saw this place years ago in the vicinity of Paris, Texas. There's also one in Wichita Falls.)

Hair We Are. (Well, you are if you're at this longtime beauty shop in Roxton.)

Hair We R, Wichita Falls. (Saves a couple of letters.)

Hairy Situation, Waco. (Surely a new do would help.)

Hairway 16. (A beauty shop on State Highway 16 in Comanche.)

Ronnie's Hair-Um, Tyler. (He must be a hunk.)

Runs With Scissors Salon, Vidor. (Perhaps not a place to take your young daughter.)

Shears to You, El Paso. ("Shears to You, Kid" would have been better.)

Shear Perfection, Waco. (Not a hair out of place here.)

Strand By Me, Longview. (Never know when Stephen King might drop by.)

The Texas Hair Force, Waco. (For that wild blue yonder look.)

Thairapy Salon, Beaumont. (You still have to sit in a chair...no couches.)

You Glow Girl, Midland. (Especially when West Texas crude is selling for $70 a barrel.)

Wizard of Ah Hair Salon, Austin. (This name must have been dreamed up by someone who just blew in from Kansas.)

Not found in Texas, but listed on one web site as existing somewhere, these names are ready to be clipped and pasted to your business: Ali Barber; Cliptomania; Comb One, Comb All; Combing Attractions; From Hair to Eternity; The Greatful Head; the Hair-After; Homecombing Queen; Julius Scissor; ShearLocks Home; and Well-Comb All.

If you're looking for a name and don't think it would be right to appropriate any of the places listed above, here are some suggestions from...uh, off the top of my head:

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Hair's to Ya
Live and Let Dye
Permanent Solutions
Roller Derby
The Tortoise and the Hair

[See also Silly Signage ]
[See Texas Towns A to Z ]

Mike Cox
"Texas Tales" September 19, 2018

Mike Cox's "Texas Tales" :

  • You Will Do 9-12-18
  • Dove Hunting and the $24 Doctor Bill 9-6-18
  • Camp Mabry 8-29-18
  • Brushy Bill Roberts 8-23-18
  • Phone Fear 8-16-18

    See more »

  • Related Topics:
    Texas Towns A to Z
    Texas Signs
    Texas Old Neon
    Texas Murals
    Texas Stores

    More Columns
    Mike Cox's "Texas Tales" :

  • You Will Do 9-12-18
  • Dove Hunting and the $24 Doctor Bill 9-6-18
  • Camp Mabry 8-29-18
  • Brushy Bill Roberts 8-23-18
  • Phone Fear 8-16-18

    See more »






































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