Humbug…so just call me Scrooge or the Grinch or whatever. What you’re about to
read is bound to make someone out there upset and probably mad, but you know what?
I don’t care. Sue me.|
In the past several days, I have been noticing that
our country, in order to be politically correct, has taken to calling this time
of the year…The Holiday Season. We now have a Holiday Tree. We’re sending out
Holiday cards. We’re singing Holiday tunes. We’re eating Holiday food.
I hate to burst your bubble, buddy, but the correct name for all of this, according
to me is Christmas. Try as you might, it’s the Christmas tree, we send Christmas
cards, we sing Christmas carols, and yes… Tiny Tim, we eat Christmas dinners.
You can name it what you want, you can change what you want, but the
real reason for the season is Christmas…the celebration of Christ. Get it? Christ….
Christmas? That’s the way it is and that’s the way it’s going to be, no matter
what you say or how much you try to change it. The star or the angel on the top
of the tree at my house isn’t going to be replaced with a model of a ’57 Chevy.
I’m not saying that everyone else can’t have a holiday of their own to celebrate,
but leave mine alone. I’m not trying to change the Jewish celebration of Chanukah
to something generic. What they believe in is their business and doesn’t offend
me in the least. More power to them. Same goes for Kwanzaa. If some folks want
to celebrate, dance and sing songs when the full moon comes out, that’s fine with
me. I don’t feel the urge to go out and try and change the lyrics to their songs
just because I might not agree with them.
So, why are certain groups in
this country trying to change my holiday? Yesterday I heard that some groups in
California (it figures) are banning Christmas carols in favor of Holiday tunes.
So, no more ‘Little Town of Bethlehem’ or ‘Away in a Manger’, which is apparently
distasteful to some and should be replaced with ‘Frosty the Snowman’ and ‘Baby,
It’s cold outside.’. Having Holiday songs certainly rules out our collective singing
of ‘White Christmas’ since the title contains the big, bad politically incorrect
“C” word. As Flo used to say…”You folks can just kiss my grits.”
a shame that as a nation we have wimped down to the point in which we are so afraid
of hurting anyone’s feelings, we compromise on everything to the point of cultural
blandness. I suppose if this practice keeps up, we’ll most likely see other changes
Valentine Day will most likely be changed to something called
“Love day” or even “Like Day” so we don’t offend those poor traumatized children
and adults who didn’t get or won’t get some candy and a card from some unknown
admirer. Heaven help us that this should happen. Perhaps we need to set up some
new Federal agency to insure that no child or adult gets left behind and that
everyone receives some gift form someone, even if it’s from some non caring computerized
governmental agency. Bah, Humbug.
Mothers Day and Fathers Day should be
changed to something that might not offend those who had a bad relationship with
their parents. We might want to lobby for these to be called something like “Significant
People Day”. That way you get to name the person you feel was most important in
your life. That gives everyone the option of leaving out their parents without
having any guilt.
Memorial Day? Can’t have that anymore…. wouldn’t be
fair to honor those who died or served in defense of our country when some of
our citizens choose to flee the country or hide out. Let’s call it something like
“Remembrance Day” so we can all be equal no matter what our individual preferences
happen to be at the time or the level of our commitment towards the country. After
all, those who stayed at home and refused to fight for our country helped keep
the economy going by eating out and going to the movies.
Day? Let’s just drop that one. It’s too old and out of date. No one cares what
a bunch of old men did a couple of hundred years ago. What they wrote and what
they believed isn’t really relative to our modern times anyway, is it? Why… just
look at their music and they way they dressed…what good could possibly come from
setting a day aside in response to their bravery and accomplishments?
Labor Day? Has to go, not fair to those who are unemployed or who MIGHT become
Halloween? I don’t like the word ‘Hallow’ …seems to me to
be connected with something religious. Need to rename this something like …”Fright
Thanksgiving? No way that can stand. Giving thanks to our creator,
is a definitely a big no- no and is certain to offend just about everyone in the
world who doesn’t believe in some form of God. Nope, can’t take a day off to just
sit down with our families and be grateful for all of the blessings we’ve received.
As idiotic as these might seem, trust me, there is a concerted effort on the part
of a portion of our population who believe our traditions, beliefs and history
should be reconstructed so as not to offend anyone. You have the right to believe
whatever you want, I respect that. You don’t have the right to change what I believe.
I’ll leave yours alone…how about you doing the same?
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From North America
December 1, 2004 column