suppose there are any number of what I would call 'dream jobs' out in this country.
You know, these would be jobs where you get paid a huge amount of money for very
little work in a great environment. I have been looking for one of these for most
of my life, without any success. Everyone I talk to wants the same thing. Lots
of money, little work, great hours. None of us have found it yet, but we're all
One of the jobs that does seem to fit this description
would be a movie reviewer. You know, the person who gets paid to watch movies
and then write up a report on what they saw. It looks to me as if this is a fairly
cush job. I have no idea what these guys get paid, but it seems as if there is
a great deal of freedom associated with this position.
First off, how would anyone know what to tell you about your concept of any movie
which you have seen? Everyone has a different idea of what the story was about
and how it was presented. You might like it and give it a great review and it
becomes a box office bomb since everyone else hated it. On the other hand everyone
might love something, and you hated it and as a result wrote a terrible review.
Who is right and who is wrong?
As they say, beauty and I suppose art as
well as a movie are in the eyes of the beholder.
Last week, the new Superman
movie came out and since we had our granddaughter staying with us for a few weeks,
we took off one afternoon to go see it. I won't give away any of the story or
details and will leave it up to you to make up your own mind as to whether you
like the film or not. I will tell you it was entertaining and made my granddaughter
happy, so it wasn't a wasted afternoon.
Now, the point to all of this is
to tell you that the people who reviewed the movie made comments such as "it lacked
logic" or "it didn't seem real".
Let's see now, a man called…"SUPERMAN" has the ability to fly, uses X-Ray vision,
super hearing and sight and other so called super powers to stop trains, planes
and objects from other space from crashing onto the earth…and these are somehow
supposed to be logical? He comes from another planet, can be shot by bullets and
bazookas and doesn't get hurt. I guess the movie reviewer wants this to be real
as well as logical in order to write a good review.
What good would a
fantasy film be if it had to be logical? It has to be illogical in order to be
a fantasy, isn't that right? How many fantasy films have you ever seem that are
totally believable? That's what makes them fantasies in the first place.
One of the reviewers made this comment…"I found parts of this movie, hard to believe."
Parts of this movie? How about this entire movie? I mean, what is believable
about some guy in tights saving the world from death and destruction 24/7, 365
days a year? How can he ever sleep? There is something bad happening in the world
at all times. If he was really on the ball and serious about stopping crime, how
does he have time to eat in the US of A when there is someone being mugged or
robbed in China? If this guy was really serious about crime reduction, then how
can he dare be so selfish as to have any kind of personal life with Lois Lane?
On that note, how can he hold down a responsible job at the Daily Planet and get
by with being absent all of the time when danger or emergencies present themselves
anywhere in the world? Looks to me as if his boss doesn't really keep tabs on
his employees if he hasn't noticed that Clark Kent is always missing whenever
there is an earthquake in Borneo or a mudslide in California.
Something that has always bothered me is his Superman suit. How does he keep it
under his regular clothes without it being all crushed up and wrinkled? I mean,
look at his cape. This isn't a small thing and we have to accept that he wears
this under his go to work suit and nobody notices it? I defy you to hang a bed
sheet around your neck and then try and wear a suit or dress over it without it
looking weird. Another thing, he always wears white shirts to work, can't you
see the red suit underneath? If I wore a red tee shirt and then a white shirt
over it, you could see it plain as day. And what about those boots? Where does
he keep them?
Besides these little questions, I've always wondered what he does with the stuff
he takes off? Where does he stash these things? I never see him carrying a gym
bag around as he flies around the world at lightening speeds. So, does he just
leave this stuff in the phone booth where he changes clothes and hopes no one
steals them before he can get back? Besides that, who has phone booths these days
anyway? In most places they won't let you use the bathrooms unless you are a customer,
so he can't just run into some sandwich shop and ask to use the men's room unless
he buys some gum or a pizza. Besides that, how can he explain that he walked into
a bathroom stall in a business suit and runs out in his red Superman suit? Isn't
this a little suspicious? The local vice squad would be on the lookout for him
in no time.
Now those things do defy logic, don't they?
Letters From North
July 6, 2006 column
Syndicated weekly in 80 newspapers
Comments go to www.pearyperry.com