TexasEscapes.com HOME Welcome to Texas Escapes
A magazine written by Texas
Custom Search
New   |   Texas Towns   |   Ghost Towns   |   Counties   |   Trips   |   Features   |   Columns   |   Architecture   |   Images   |   Archives   |   Site Map

Columns
History/Opinion


Texas Towns
A - Z

Texas | Columns | "Quips and Salsa"

When did your rock
last roll?

by Jase Graves
Jase Graves
Like many Americans allergic to adulting, I often zone out on Facebook when I should be doing something more useful-like scooping the litter box or lecturing my children about the dangers of social media. Inevitably, I come across one of those surveys posted by Facebook users who are probably planning to hack into my account and steal my pet selfies.

I recently saw a survey that asks you to identify various rock concerts you've attended, and since my teen years were in the 1980's, attending rock concerts was a rite of passage that ranked right up there with cursing at your Rubik's Cube and sporting your first fuzzstache.

So hold on to your Hacky Sack, and let's do this!

First Concert
In August of 1985, a friend's parents dropped off two of my fellow fifteen-year-old nerdlings and me at the legendary and slightly dilapidated Hirsch Memorial Coliseum in Shreveport, LA, for the "World Infestation" tour of the hair metal band Ratt-with Bon Jovi, ironically, as the opening act. As we sat at the back of the venue's top row seating with our mouths agape, we could actually feel our undeveloped mullets standing on end as we were initiated into the world of live power chords, drum solos, and overly excited girls with impressively permed, crimped, and teased hairdos as far as the eye could ogle.

Last Concert
Since my wife and I are now the parents of three teen daughters who would rather fold laundry while watching Wolf Blitzer discuss geopolitics on CNN than hang out with us, we've caught a few concerts on our own over the past couple of years. Our most recent event was the Billy Joel concert at Globe Life Park in Arlington, Texas. The show was fantastic, and it was great to remain comfortably seated with hundreds of other boring, middle-aged couples singing along to hits from our teen years while waiting for an opportune moment to take a bathroom break.

Best Concert
I witnessed the epitome of 80's British metal and poor spelling when Def Leppard performed in Shreveport for the "Hysteria" tour in 1987. Not only was I amazed by the laser show and Leppard drummer Rick Allen's inspiring one-armed performance, but standing near the stage in my sleeveless Union Jack shirt, I was surrounded by hundreds of squealing teenage girls who didn't seem to mind that I was there-or that I probably forgot to wear deodorant.

Worst Concert
Nothing against the R&B legend, but I only went to see Keith Sweat in 1988 because the girl I was dating at the time liked Keith Sweat. I've got about as much rhythm and blues as Mr. Rogers on his least-funky days in the neighborhood.

Most Surprising Concert
I'm not sure what I was expecting, but the 1988 Rush concert in Shreveport was a true revelation-despite the relatively small number of bodacious babes in attendance. From Neil Peart's phenomenal percussion work that demonstrated what a truly inadequate drummer I was, to the Toronto band's cerebral lyrics, the show left me feeling exhilarated, more respectful of Canada-and slightly smarter.

Loudest Concert
The concert that probably contributed most to the fact that I often can't hear my daughters asking for money was the 1988 Texxas Jam "Monsters of Rock" festival at The Cotton Bowl in Dallas. The lineup featured such eardrum-slaying legends as Van Halen, Scorpions, Metallica, Dokken, and Kingdom Come. Van Halen's Sammy Hagar actually lost his voice at the concert-and I lost my ability to tell the difference between the smoke alarm and the microwave beeping when my chicken taquitos are ready.

It's nice that my wife and I can still occasionally get away to see elderly 1980's icons taking advantage of the fact that their fans are now old enough to carry a line of credit. But these days, I mostly get my head banger fix from the praise band at church. And if I'm feeling particularly nostalgic, I'll rock out to Def Leppard on my iPhone while I scoop the litter box and take a few pet selfies.
RATT
RATT
Jase Graves photo

Jase Graves
"Quips and Salsa" February 12, 2019 column


Related Topic:
Texas Music


Jase Grave's "Quips and Salsa" columns
Humor


  • Star Wars: The Memories Awaken 1-28-20
  • Take an Uncertain Road Trip 1-14-20
  • Beating the after-Christmas blues 12-30-19
  • Another Christmas card letter 12-16-19
  • Deck the Halls and Hit the Deck 12-3-19

    more »

  • More Columns

    Jase Grave's "Quips and Salsa" columns
    Humor


  • Star Wars: The Memories Awaken 1-28-20
  • Take an Uncertain Road Trip 1-14-20
  • Beating the after-Christmas blues 12-30-19
  • Another Christmas card letter 12-16-19
  • Deck the Halls and Hit the Deck 12-3-19

    more »


  •  

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     


    Texas Escapes Online Magazine »   Archive Issues » Home »
    TEXAS TOWNS & COUNTIES TEXAS LANDMARKS & IMAGES TEXAS HISTORY & CULTURE TEXAS OUTDOORS MORE
    Texas Counties
    Texas Towns A-Z
    Texas Ghost Towns

    TEXAS REGIONS:
    Central Texas North
    Central Texas South
    Texas Gulf Coast
    Texas Panhandle
    Texas Hill Country
    East Texas
    South Texas
    West Texas

    Courthouses
    Jails
    Churches
    Schoolhouses
    Bridges
    Theaters
    Depots
    Rooms with a Past
    Monuments
    Statues

    Gas Stations
    Post Offices
    Museums
    Water Towers
    Grain Elevators
    Cotton Gins
    Lodges
    Stores
    Banks

    Vintage Photos
    Historic Trees
    Cemeteries
    Old Neon
    Ghost Signs
    Signs
    Murals
    Gargoyles
    Pitted Dates
    Cornerstones
    Then & Now

    Columns: History/Opinion
    Texas History
    Small Town Sagas
    Black History
    WWII
    Texas Centennial
    Ghosts
    People
    Animals
    Food
    Music
    Art

    Books
    Cotton
    Texas Railroads

    Texas Trips
    Texas Drives
    Texas State Parks
    Texas Rivers
    Texas Lakes
    Texas Forts
    Texas Trails
    Texas Maps
    USA
    MEXICO
    HOTELS

    Site Map
    About Us
    Privacy Statement
    Disclaimer
    Contributors
    Staff
    Contact Us

     
    Website Content Copyright Texas Escapes LLC. All Rights Reserved